merry christmas!

This year brought so many new things, we are so very rich in our life, I am very thankful. 

Merry Christmas from our family to yours, hope it is a bright one.

 

Happy Christmas (the war is over)- John Lennon

year coming- singing sundays

I heard the counting crows the other day and it made my list for the week about the year ahead of us.
enjoy!
Long December- counting crows
make it through this year- great lake swimmers
next year- Foo Fighters

beach rocks

This is one of the beach rocks we picked up in the summer.

It's now a magnet on my fridge :)

a little reflection.

This time of year brings a lot of looking inward for me, makes me think about what the last year brought and how I would like this year to be.
Each year that goes by seems a little more precious now. We are responsible for three amazing little kiddos and their experiences each year. As well as being responsible for our own happiness and experiences in the coming year as well. My biggest hope for the coming year is to strive to be more about experiences and less about material things. This is something we have been working on for a few years now, but it seems ever more important as the boys get older and start to really take in the world.
Having Hector, and going through so much emotion and growth in one year alone really put a new perspective on things for me as a parent, as a person. If I want things to be a certain way, I have to make that happen. We as a family have to make that happen. If I wish for more out door experiences, we just need to put on our shoes and do it. Leave the dirty dishes in the sink, and the piles of laundry in the corners. They will be waiting when we get back.
No need to rush through the days with no time to enjoy, too busy tackling all the tasks I feel the need to get done to be the perfect mom, partner, and woman.
I want to set an example for these loving, sweet little boys over the years. Show them that the world has a lot to offer them and that they are the maker of their own happiness. Hopefully a simple start to that will be taking advantage of the great outdoors and not getting caught up in the busy of everyday life.
Just a little thought.

white stripe's secrets- Singing sundays

So many years ago when I had the pleasure of seeing these guys in concert, they were doing secret shows during their tour. Dave and I were eating a quick lunch waiting for them to announce where they were. We actually chased the car they were in, hoping to get into the show. We missed it, but I had friends that made it in time, they had a great time. Oh the days of chasing musicians, that was fun.
Here are three of the secret shows that I thought looked amazing, including the one we missed.

Locas Bar
Transit Bus
On a Boat

coffee time - singing Sundays

This week I was thinking of how nice it would be to sit quietly in a coffee shop, with a book and hours of time. Like I used to before kids!

So I take inspiration from those coffee shops and the music I used to hear in them.

so sorry- Feist
dynamite walls- Hayden
banana pancakes- Jack Johnson

happy heart.

A small update on Hector and his heart.
He had his first follow-up appointment after being discharged from the hospital. His echo and ekg both went very well, and the team is very happy with his weight gain and how he is looking! His incision site is pretty much healed with some stitches that have surfaced. They should eventually fall off, they are the dissolving ones but need to be in skin to dissolve. So we shall see how long they take to go away! All in all he is doing really great. Had/ has his first cold! Which I am going to assume it is impossible to keep away colds with his older brother in preschool.
His chest bones should basically be healed now. Tomorrow is 6 weeks after surgery! It is going to be more of a challenge for us to slowly get used to picking him up like a normal baby, after training ourselves not to.
The greatest thing from just yesterday is this, him sleeping with his arms above his shoulders. It is so nice to know that he is comfortable again.

Thank you everyone for reading and sending us your well wishes, they mean a lot!

live at bbc- singing sundays

Live music links this week. Love the age we live in, where I can watch/listen to concerts from before I existed in the comfort of my own home.

The black keys
Neil young
Oscar Peterson

Life

I made a list of the things that I would really like to do with my life, things that make me happy and what my utmost important goals are. To write them somewhere, I figured I would blog them. It is my short list.

What I want to do with my life, from most important to sometime in this lifetime. 

•be a great partner (maybe wife someday)

•be a good mother

•be creative

•be a successful photographer 

•become a childbirth educator/ doula

•play the piano

•travel 

baby likes - singing Sundays

I take my inspiration from little Hector this week. These are songs he likes; when fussy he will calm down listing to these.

Cigarettes and chocolate milk- Rufus wainwright

My favourite things- John Coltrane 

The great exhale- the Great Lake swimmers

Sleep dreaming- singing Sundays

This week, getting back to my musical posts, I am celebrating (for lack of a better word, as I am taking the positive approach. Laughable) our lack of sleep as parents.
The newborn stage does not last forever, but does it ever feel never ending. Days of no showers, pj attire, and coffee; with children tearing apart the house. It's honestly a blast and days of survival all at the same time.

I know I will look back when I'm older and not only miss it, but long for it. 

Well, back to the music!

No sleep- Sam Roberts band
Just dropped in- Kenny rodgers and the first edition
No sleep till Brooklyn- Beastie Boys

cuteness.

This was the cuteness that visited the day after Hector was born. Candy sponsored by Nanny haha

Inviting.

It's strange how much I love my kitchen. I love the colours, the warmth it always seems to have. I even love the kid hand prints and smears all over the windows and the tiny toys that always seem to occupy the windowsill.

I love my kitchen and all it's little imperfections.

Yes, we do need more chairs. Two, to be precise. 

Hector's recovery.

After surgery, they tell you that once he starts coming off of things, they start coming off really fast. This was no lie! He was intubated and had many lines and tubes the day after surgery.

Two days after surgery he was extubated, chest tube out, as well as off a lot of his meds.

By the afternoon he was allowed to breastfeed again! I was so happy and shocked that I could have cried.

He fed so well over the next 12 hours that the next morning we were sent to the Med Surg floor. They told me that besides breathing issues, feeding issues are the main reason that babies stay in ICU and hospital for a while. 

Hector was feeding like a champ. He took a little while (understandably) to sleep well again, as he was uncomfortable, but he did so well.

5 days post op we were sent home on no more than a diuretic and Tylenol. We didn't tell many people we were home until later in the week. Trying to get used to being a family of five with a newborn who needs special care is tough, but we are learning everyday. We have been home for almost two weeks now and have found a little bit of a groove. 

It's still worrisome sometimes because Hector is very susceptible to infections and can not be around anyone who is sick or has been around sick people. They sent us home with a list of recommendations, one being staying out of public places for 4-6 weeks. So the whole process has been a little isolating, but I am counting down the days until little Hector is considered fully healed (which happens to coincide nicely with his 2 month vaccinations) and we can go do things with his brothers, and he can meet the people who were rooting for him.

The outpouring of love and support for this little man and our family has been incredible. Thank you, from the bottom of our hearts.

Surgery day.

This was one of the hardest days I have had in my life so far. Not to sound over dramatic, but it was brutal.

My heart raced, I was nauseated, my mind was going a mile a minute. For the whole 8 hours.

The worst part was that we had a misunderstanding on the time and were expecting him out of the OR hours before  he came out. This, of course, caused needless tears and more stress and anxiety until we found out it would be hours more. Then we were able to settle into more waiting.

Our day, although stressful, was a positive one. We knew he was in great hands, we knew the surgery was a must, we knew that he had gone into this a very healthy baby boy. He had amazing chances, and all odds seemed in his favour. The surgeon came out to talk to us, he told us the surgery was very successful and they expected a full recovery. Hector did wonderfully. 

After the hours and hours of waiting we were allowed to go see him, It was supper time. We had passed him to the OR nurse at 8 in the morning. He was hooked up to more wires, lines, and tubes, then space on his little body. Having worked in the hospital setting for years, this didn't scare me as much as I thought. Although, it being my own child allowed the silent tears to make their way down my cheeks.

He had a bunch of episodes of SVT throughout the evening, the Dr's told us that it wasn't surprising. His little heart was very irritated from surgery, but we should expect that he would be fine from there on out. They try non-medical intervention to bring the heart rate down first, holding a bag of ice on my baby's face was the last thing I was wanting to see, but amazingly it worked.

It was the longest day I have experienced, I am so very grateful that we are past it.

Because I am missing many a singing Sundays.

Have you even felt extremely attached to a song, nothing you can explain. You just love it and the more time passes and the more you hear it, the more you feel from it?

I know I have felt strangely in love with this song, little did I know just how much I would relate it to my current situation. Or just how much it would calm me when I could feel my heart race, thinking of the reality we face tomorrow.

I know I have posted it before; 

Sunrise, sunset - we are trees

Amazing song, that has yet to disappoint.

Welcoming Hector.

We welcomed our little heart warrior, Hector Ulysses, on Oct 16. 

It was an amazing labour and delivery. I know I've said it before, but I really can't say enough for midwives. It made what could have been a very stressful situation, very smooth and natural. 

He was born at 12:37 pm, after about 3 hours of active labour, and a night of early labour that stopped just enough for us to get four hours of sleep! Something I had never experienced before, but everyone told me afterwards that third babies are little tricksters :)

He had his atrial balloon septostomy about two hours after birth, it was pretty incredible. They did it right in the PICU and Dave and I were able to sit and watch the proceedure. We also found out that Hector does have a small VSD (ventricle septum defect) that will be closed during his surgery. Something they couldn't see in utero.

He has been a champion nurser, everyone is very happy with that. It gives him a major advantage going into surgery, and I am so pleased. It was something I was worried about, as I have found breastfeeding to be such a wonderful experience in the past with my two older boys. I was also worried because a lot of cardiac babies don't do well with breastfeeding, as they tire easily.

It was, and is, something that is very important to me. So without that stress, this process has been going as smooth as it really can. 

With surgery coming up in a couple days I do find myself a tiny bit more on edge, but I know we are in spectacular care. The team of nurses, doctors, and specialists are just amazing. They have really made this easier, even the smallest of things have made really hard days seem less large. 

More then anything, our family and friends have made this transition into Hector's life as normal as it can be. We love you more then words can express, thank you for everything you are doing. We really couldn't do this without you. 

I will keep updating as things progress. I apologize for the lack of grammatically correct sentences, as I am updating from my phone. Isn't technology wonderful!

my rock -singing Sundays

This week I thought it was very important to acknowledge someone of utmost importance in my life. He has been my rock, through thick and thin. He has made a family with me, where there was just me trying to figure out where I fit in the world. He makes me laugh, every single day.
He makes every bit of my life so very worth it.
I love you Dave.

•  That's how strong my love is- Otis Redding
•  5 Days in May- Blue Rodeo
•  Smile- Pearl Jam
• Listen (listen, listen)- Wintersleep
• Harvest moon- Neil Young

c'mon little baby- Singing Sundays

Just a little musical push for the little baby.

• Tired of waiting- The Trews
• All these things that I've done- The killers
• Just Breathe- Pearl Jam
• Sunday Smile- Beirut
• We're going to be friends- The white stripes

so, I dyed a purse.

I always forget to take before pictures. Something I need to work on, definitely.

This is a progression of a really old purse I had that was an off white knit. So old in fact, it went to my younger sister for a number of years and then came back to me. I decided to give it a new life, away from the few stains it had accumulated over the years. (Seriously, who buys a white purse!? Not a smart choice on my part)

I think chocolate brown was a great colour choice :) 

let's get loud- singing sundays

Warning, I like a lot of loud, screamy, and in your face kind of music. My mother used to refer to some of it as noise. I say fair enough :) If you are in the mood for some loud music, please enjoy!

• Turn it out- Death from above 1979
• Tangled up in plaid- Queens of the stone age
• Black Tongue- Yeah yeah yeahs
• Black Door- Black Keys
• Outtathaway- The Vines

tiny curtain.

Made a small curtain for our tiny kitchen window. I think it turned out cute.

tom waits- Singing Sundays

Who doesn't love some Tom Waits? I know the uniqueness of his music and perfectly timed hitting of random objects have always made me want to hear more. He's pretty awesome.

• Diamonds and Gold
• Yesterday is here
• Going out west
• Way down in the hole
• God's away on business

full term!?

This past week I reached 37 weeks in my pregnancy.
I can not believe how fast this has gone. I can't help but think that it surely has been even faster then my second pregnancy.  I know the multiple appointments that seem never ending and working for as long as I can has made it fast, but I am willing to bet that running after two boys everyday is what did it.

Better get some nice belly shots and family shots in before I run out of time! (and energy)
Here's an iphone progression of me looking super impressed every time.

encourage- a late singing sunday!

This week's music post is all uplifting, after my last post!

• Everything's not lost- Coldplay
• Rise- Eddie Vedder
• Here comes the sun- Beatles 
• Don't worry, be happy- Bobby McFerrin
• You and I- Ingrid Michaelson

heart.

   As I near the end of my pregnancy with our third amazing little boy, I have found myself struggling on whether or not I should write this post. I've thought that a lot of people in our lives will want to know, want to help, and even possibly be hurt by not knowing. I have also had the other end of the spectrum with, not wanting to share, not wanting to bother people, not wanting to deal with the sympathies and questions.
I came to realise that by not sharing, it was possible that I was not dealing with it fully. Even having been in a near constant state of hopefulness and optimism (regardless of the tears), it doesn't have to be quite as 'real' if most people don't know.
I also didn't want anything negative to define our littlest boy, but I realise that sharing what we have/are/and will being going through will not only show how much of a fighter he is, but it could possibly help others in the same situations. To hear a personal story is something I have found priceless in preparing for my little boy and the road we will endure in the next few months.

Our little heart warrior.

This all started when we sat, making jokes, killing time, awaiting the ultrasound technician to let us know all was good and we could go home. We were at my 20 week anatomy ultrasound, and with my previous experiences they were a pretty quick thing. After waiting for what seemed like hours I started to feel a little uneasy. When the Doctor came in with the tech, I knew there was something up.
The doctor was spouting off big words and might as well have been the teacher from Charlie Brown. All I heard was 'Variation in major vessels of the heart', 'will need to see you right away for fetal echo'. I know I had the deer in the headlights look as I opened my eyes as big as they could go in order to not cry. I felt so silly having been so preoccupied with looking for the baby's gender when being faced with something so serious.
Of course 'see you right away' was a week away. It was a really long week of unknowns, I felt sick to my stomach all the time, and I found myself staring into nothing a lot, just waiting for the next ultrasound.
The next week, during the fetal echo (which is a focused ultrasound with fancier cameras) Dave and I held hands, staring at the screen, watching our little baby's heart beating well. It had four chambers, no holes, and the blood was mixing as it should. The doctor came with the technologist again, and sat us down to explain what they had found, and the basic anatomy of it. Then they sent us off for lunch to return to fetal assessment for a follow up ultrasound to confirm what they had found.
The high risk Obstetrician explained to us, while confirming through the scan, that our little baby had a congenital heart defect. Transposition of the Great Vessels, also known as Transposition of the Great Arteries (TGV or TGA). It is literally what it sounds like, the position of the great arteries (Pulmonary and Aortic) are switched where they enter the heart. This makes the blood circulate through the lungs, come back to the heart, and then re-circulate through the lungs. Leaving the body with blood that has no oxygen. While in utero, the baby has a valve that remains open and mixes the blood well regardless of the heart defect. Once born this valve closes, and the defect is fatal unless treated fairly quickly.
The OB was very understanding, very good at explaining, and very good at answering all of our questions and fears.
We found out then that this meant our baby would need a echo cardiogram, a cardiac catheter procedure and medication right after birth, followed by open heart surgery to fix the defect, within the first week of life.  While taking in all this information, when the OB asked if we wanted to know what we were having, we both knew that having a little something to take our minds off the news we had just received was a good idea. We were having another boy.

At first, after learning all of this, everything seemed surreal. I floated around in a fog, trying to wrap my head around what all of this meant. After many more ultrasounds, cardiologist appointments, neonatologist appointments, as well as my regular appointments with my midwives, we found there is a very straightforward plan. We are in wonderful hands and I couldn't be more thankful for everyone who has been a place of constant support through this endeavor. I was also extremely happy to learn that because our little boy is fine while incubating, I have been able to keep with my midwives and not been shuffled off to a high risk obstetrician. This has been a great source of strength for me, as they are very much on the same page as I am. They are my advocates when I can not be, and have been able to share very positive experiences with me about similar cases.
We have also been very fortunate to have a huge, amazing support system. Without all the people that have been our rock, I am not sure what we would do.You all know who you are, we love you and want to extend an impossible thank you. To infinity.

I am hoping that with this post we can keep family and friends updated, I do plan on updating as things happen. I am not sure how often this will be, but it is with my best intentions.
We also hope not to offend anyone, but we would really appreciate our continued privacy during this time. Thank you for taking the time to read this post, and thank you everyone for your continued support, it really does make a difference no matter the extent. Thank you.

get off the couch- Singing Sundays

How about some upbeat songs that make you want to get up off your butt and do that thing you do.
Sounds good?
Good.

• Jumble Jumble- White Stripes
• Lonely Boy- Black Keys
• My United States of Whatever- Liam Lynch
• Don't you Evah- Spoon
• Date with the night- Yeah Yeah Yeahs

september brings school- Singing Sundays

This time of year reminds me of longs walks to school, the slow turning of the leaves, days getting shorter, the crisp in the air and Halloween sneaking up on us. I can't wait for October, and our new addition :)

Enjoy!

• What are we gonna do (come the month of September)- Matt Mays and El Torpedo
• Another Brick in the wall- Pink Floyd
• Education- Pearl jam
• One September Day- Nina Simone
• ABC- Jackson 5
• Walk this way- Aerosmith
• Hot for teacher- Van Halen
• Rock 'N' Roll high school- Ramones
• Me and Julio down by the school yard- Paul Simon
• Jeremy- Pearl Jam (yeah, yeah, I'm a big pearl jam fan)

eat your veggies.

The many faces of the strange pregnant craving of stir fry only. Mainly consisting of veggies. It's honestly all I want.

Whatever I can find in the fridge, add a small amount of butter, garlic, and basil. Ready, set, eat!

Muffin making.

Thought we would try a recipe I found through bloglovin.

Turned out amazing! I will definitely have to add it to my recipe book.

They are fluffy and super tasty. Best part being that the boys devoured one and came begging for another.

emotions.

My emotions are feeling a little bit like an exposed nerve today. Tomorrow will be better. Almost 34 weeks.
Under the waves- Pete Droge

amazing screams - Singing Sunday's

This Sunday we explore five songs with awesome screams or yells in them. Enjoy!

• We won't get fooled again- The Who
• Love is a good thing- Sheryl Crow
• Kasmir- Led Zeppelin
• Piece of my heart- Janis Joplin
• Monkey Wrench- Foo Fighters

childrens music, just how important is it?

If you are a parent, have younger siblings, or have been around children at any point in your life, you have heard at least some children's music.
I have incredibly wonderful memories tied to Sharon, Lois, and Bram, and sing my children their songs, without a thought.
I have though, always had other music playing as well. Whether it be rock, classical, hip hop, etc. You name it, it has probably played on my stereo with my children's ears within listening distance.

I am so curious what other parents think about music and their children, is it an important thing in your household? I am a really strong believer of introducing kids to many different types of music, and watching their love for it blossom. Music is and has been a very important part of my life since I can remember. 
I guess I just wonder, while fun and great, is children's music really that important? With my family we have a 'everything in moderation' philosophy, and I feel with music it is no different.

Andrew Bird- Singing Sundays

He is brilliant. End of story.
Enjoy!

• Why
• Ethiobirds
• Skin is, my
• Happy Day
• Lull

blue. - singing sundays

Reflective of my mood, enjoy.

• I am mine- Pearl Jam
• The scientist- Coldplay
• Tired of waiting- The Trews 
• Sunday Smile- Beirut
• Track23 (bull dog blues)- Buck65

road trip! -Singing Sundays

Today, as we head to the zoo, I thought having a road trip playlist would be perfect! Enjoy!

• Road Trippin'- Red Hot Chili Peppers
• Everyday is a Winding Road- Sheryl Crow
• Copperhead Road- Steve Earle
• Bittersweet Symphony- The Verve
• Life is a Highway- Tom Cochrane

baking experiments.

I made a glaze/drizzle for some cupcakes today. We are taking them to a family dinner tonight. Somehow, I managed to make fudge? Pretty tasty! 

The glaze contains butter, white chocolate, icing sugar, and milk. If asked to make it again.... Not sure I could pull it off!

Also, on another note, these beach rocks are going to turn themselves into Christmas presents :) I will post the different results.

And to end my random post today, here are some better photos of my beautiful, sunny, and bright sun flowers!

birthday, beach day.

This week being the boys birthdays in our household, we have been celebrating just about everyday in some way or another.

We headed to build-a-bear after many mall trips of them asking so politely. They really enjoyed the experience. We also had a lovely evening at the beach, had some spider inspired ice cream cakes and will be heading to the zoo this weekend! Somewhere amongst all the celebrating the boys still managed to make mommy feel special, with some lovely flowers!

As always, I'm better with pictures, so here is out week thus far.

Happy Birthday, to my sweet boys. We love you more then words could ever tell.